Desperate times call for desperate measures.
 For many of us, this is true when life throws a good one – two punch. The economy is up, jobs are abundant
(not really), but some folks are still doing a whole lotta trying, just to get up that hill.


Despite what media outlets are reporting, many people, including gay men, are having to find alternative streams of income to maintain that deluxe apartment in the sky. That steady, but not so secure 9 to 5 may not be enough to make ends meet, or fund trips to Afrochella. While some men are solely banking on antiquated concepts of stacking degrees, spending excessive hours in the office, and belief in the illusion of the American dream, others are opting to take a less conventional approach to the side hustle. Enter the world of Only Fans.



Get that look of judgement off your face! I can sense the muscles tightening above your brow with disapproval, but maybe it’s time for you to keep an open mind. I certainly had to.



For those of you willfully choosing to submerge your heads in the sand, Only Fans is a monthly subscription service which allows faithful followers to see adult content (although not all of it is but…C’mon) from their favorite social media celebrities, adult entertainers and then some (more on this later). The NSFW content can range from exclusive racy photos, to videos that would make even Kim Kardashian and Ray J blush. Your court side seat to indulging in the voyeuristic outlet can be all yours for $9.99+. Y’all with it or nah?


Now for the rest of you who were already in the know, you’ve witnessed the surge in Only Fans  accounts and you may, or may not be surprised by who’s actually operating them. It’s not just for reality show personalities, exotic dancers, and porn stars anymore. Everyone from the mailman to Rashad in accounting may be moonlighting in a very lucrative venture with the upmost discretion.


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Imagine living in a world where You stay on the grind because you have goals that you want to achieve, You keep your circle very tight because you don't like to let people get too close to where they can hurt you, You have Plethora of people trying to get at you for whatever reason, You are judged by people that don't even know you, people think they know you from social media and think that that's the real you…..I can go on and on. I can say this, i am so happy where i am in life right now. My credit is better, i have a savings , i have my own place, i have a luxury car, and I'm finally LIVING!!!!! The only thing I'm missing is a partner to build and share everything with. I've learned that l Energy is the only pathway to my heart. I use to say i have a type but I've never been in a relationship with anyone who i said was "My Type". It's been more about a connection. If you aren't being 100% Authentic with me, i will pick up on it. That to me is a deal breaker. I'm an open book. I'm not ashamed of anything I've been through or anything that i currently do. I will be straight up and 100% with you. Some people can't take that but that's me. Take me for who i am. Don't try to put me in a box and apply all those traditional beliefs to our situation because we are already in a none traditional lifestyle. So this is a whole new ball game. For those who see me on social media and that's it, you don't see me!!!! You have to look beyond that to truly get to know anyone. Social media is not real. That's where people are always "ON". If you model, sing, dance, or have an Only Fans Page, it's where you promote your shit. If you really want to get to know someone outside of that you have to dig deeper and be different. Don't come at me and say "omg i want to eat your ass so bad" and then in the same breath say "i want to get to know you"…… GTFOOH!!!! Don't get me wrong, i get it. I really do. I'm not offended by stuff like that but know that you have been put in a category with those who "didn't dig deeper" or "that didn't look beyond what they saw on a social media platform. * * Ok I'm done. Lol. Whoop whoop

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Now if you would allow yourself to put your societal conditioning, religious indoctrination, and Victorian rules of social etiquette aside (yes I’m being sarcastic), you might realize that Only Fans as an additional source of income isn’t the worst idea ever. Being an actual performer, or a subscriber on the platform, may not be your cup of tea, but can we admit it’s borderline genius and quite possibly the answer to financial woes if you’re bold enough to pull it off? I mean if momma and the gym gave it to you, why not shake it for views and pay a bill or two?


When I first became aware of Only Fans, my initial thoughts were I just can’t see myself ever paying money to become a subscriber but for those of you who can- live your best life! In the last two years, I’ve noticed dozens of accounts unapologetically advertising on Twitter for their *cough* – services. The jaw dropper for me was stumbling upon men I actually knew by way of their identifiable tattoos, or familiar home decor.



All of this was a bit jarring to take in but also fascinating at the same time. I definitely recall asking myself is this what we’re doing now in an attempt at clout chasing? I was however, enlightened by the reasoning behind the decisions for some who choose to have an Only Fans account. Much to my judge-mental surprise, my mind was blown (pun not intended) by strangers on social media, and from friends whose opinions on the platform weren’t what I expected. I firmly believe many of us publicly feel one way about provocative topics, and entirely different in private.


It was the brutal honesty of a Twitter user with a robust following which eventually led to my new found understanding of Only Fans. The social media titan boasted about the amount of money he made in a month from the growing platform, and other streaming services. Call me crazy but there’s nothing desperate about that. It was apparently so profitable for him that I found myself seriously rethinking much of my decisions in life up to this point.



He added that it was a legit means to an end, and wanted to capitalize off of his fame, physique, and influence to finance his true passions of entrepreneurship. It beats killing himself for forty hours a week at a corporate job he hated just to pay off student loans I thought.


I also spoke with a friend who mentioned a buddy of his who purchased a home in Atlanta via supplemental income from stripping, and Only Fans. We found ourselves both in agreement that maybe the choices of some, which allows for financial freedom, doesn’t have to look a certain way. We envied their confidence, and ability to possess the agency not subscribe to what society dictates as appropriate, or the status quo.


I know all too well that unemployment, and struggling to survive isn’t a walk in the park. If having an Only Fans account could ease the stigma, and burden of being financially strapped, I have to say there is a part of me that wishes it were something I would consider. Who am I, or anyone else for that matter to judge?


If you’re part of a marginalized community, your reality can create a level of compassion for those who are often looked down upon. Being a snob towards how someone legally makes a living wasn’t something I was comfortable with. Historically, gay men have always lived by our own set of cultural norms. The increasing acceptance of Only Fans is just another extension of that.



We spend so much of our lives doing things to please others. We make decisions based upon silly rules that have more to do with group-think, and conformity rather than individual thought, or the proverbial pursuit of happiness. Although not my cup of tea, Only Fans like the evolution of the workforce, may be the change we didn’t see coming, but not exactly disappointed that it’s here. If consenting adults are engaging responsibly and not hurting anyone, I say as long as you live, it’s you and the choices that work for you baby, and there ain’t nothing wrong with that!